SATIRE

The Snooze Button

June 24, 2010
Lazy Pineapple

Every morning, most of us lift our head up from the pillow, wipe the drool from our cheek, sneak out a hand from under the covers to shut the insistent chirping of the infernal machine, the morning alarm. The extra 10 minutes after pressing the Snooze button is like manna, it is the best sleep we have ever had till the alarm rudely points out again that you need to get up.

If you are like my hubs (Hubby), you will not hear the alarm even if the volume of the chirping has reached deafening proportions. I have to poke him in the ribs to make him stop the racket. He will give me a look as if I have lost it and slowly reach out to shut the alarm. After the noise has stopped, hubs will turn and curl himself up and fall in deep slumber. As for me, I am left trying to lure back the wonderful dream which was rudely disrupted.

I lie in bed, tossing and turning to find a comfortable position so that I could resume my dream. But now, sleep has evaporated and my bladder gives me a signal that it is at a bursting stage and something needs to be done fast or there could be an accident. I don’t scare easily and ignore the warnings, I close my eyes and pretend to sleep. My bladder is not giving up without a fight and the persistent spasms make it inevitable that I have to bow down and run to the loo. What is with women and bladders? It is as if the older we grow our bladders shrink in size.

After this tussle, it is pointless to reclaim the lost sleep and I trundle off to make coffee and remove the cobwebs from my brain. As I am making coffee, the snooze button on hubs phone chirps again, by now my patience has been stretched thin and I go and rouse hubs. After the alarm has been finally shut off, hubby will ask me to wake him after thirty minutes. I say yes but inside I am seething and I feel like pulling back the covers and screaming ‘I never wanted to get up early in the first place, you set the alarm and now you get to sleep while I am up’. Life is surely unfair….

While growing up, during exam time, my older sister and I would decide to get up early in the morning to study. I would be wide awake and would end up waking her after every few minutes and she would be requesting ‘Just ten minutes more and I promise I will get up’.

I feel like a human snooze button and every time without fail I do my duty of waking people up. I envy people who can fall back to sleep so easily and quickly even after their sleep has been disrupted. I cannot do it even if I try so hard. My mind is filled up with thoughts the moment my eyes open and I start planning the day ahead, I am charged up and then I cannot fall back to sleep.

I am sure one of these days I am going to throw Hubs mobile out of the window in a fit of anger.

How many of you use the snooze button on your Mobile phone or Alarm Clock each morning?

I bet, most of you are grinning and nodding your head.

Blogging for me happened by chance, it was the product of time on my hand and the itch to try something new. With more than 2 years of writing a Blog I can now call myself a Writer. I write a humour blog and leave it to the rest of the world to handle more serious subjects. I write fiction and Hindi Cinema and sometimes do Book Reviews. To have a good laugh do visit me.
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